gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS's topics - tribe.net

I learned number 79 the hard way

thomas666 — Wed, 03 May 2006 17:45:42 GMT

100 Things You Need To Know About Women

You Know Not To Forget Her Birthday And That Her Favorite Flowers Are Purple Tulips. But You Need The Complete List. Please Use It Responsibly.

100. Girls enjoy always having something kind of wrong, like a headache or cramping or something. Remember: No matter how bad it sounds, she's going to outlive you.

99. Most women will not have sex for the first time with a guy unless their legs are shaved. If your date shows up and you spot stubble, she's trying to keep herself in line.

98. No matter how much she reassures you, if you can't get a hard-on she assumes you're not attracted to her.

97. Beware of your girlfriend's single party friend or gay bud. They want her to be single with them and will encourage any bad behavior as often as possible.

96. Jewelry. Now you always know what to get her for a last-minute gift.

95. The sight of you in your socks and underwear is the biggest turnoff in the world.

94. Never trust a girl who has no girlfriends. She doesn't get along with other women because she's either bat-shit crazy or just plain mean.

93. Girls who say, "I love sports!" are lying. Girls who ask you what time the game is on, without specifying which game they're talking about, are not.

92. A random hookup is more likely to result in pregnancy, because a woman has more sex when she's most fertile.

91. She still has all the love letters and cards from her past boyfriends.

90. Just started dating? Women want you to drive, even if it's their car.

89. A girl would prefer to get a $100 gift from Tiffany & Co. than a $500 gift from Fortunoff. Why? Because her friends will ask where she got it.

88. "If I give you my number on Friday, Tuesday and Wednesday are your best bets to score a date. Monday is too desperate, Thursday is too late."

87. Your female coworkers are obsessed with the fact that on average they receive less pay than male counterparts and the fact that they work less overtime and get pregnant is irrelevant to the discussion.

86. Laying a towel down over the wet spot is like putting your jacket over a mud puddle for her, you noble bastard.

85. A recent study revealed that natural blondes could be extinct in 200 years, so unless she's Norwegian, her towhead might be bottled.

84. Sixteen percent of American men have been with a prostitute scientific proof most women are decent in bed.

83. Women always want to believe what you're saying is true.

82. What do women really want in bed? More blankets. They get colder than men.

81. The threesome is not about you; it's about the two girls. If you're lucky enough to score one with your girlfriend, enjoy sex with the other one because there's a good chance it'll end the relationship.

80. If women have an excuse to take a pill, they'll take it.

79. Never trust the woman who gives you the best blow job you've ever had.

78. "I hate when my boyfriend is sweaty and tries to lie down on top of me or cuddle after I've cum. Wait five minutes."

77. The average woman kisses 79 men before getting married.

76. She hates your Xbox more than she lets on. Blow her off for some gaming and she'll soon stop wasting time on a dork like you.

75. Women who are obsessed with their dogs also like to keep their men on a short leash.

74. "Girls who buy their men lap dances and pretend to enjoy it are kidding themselves. They're trying to keep him happy with some controlled freedom."

73. Over the course of her life, a woman will use 10 men for every one she loves. If you lent her your car or helped her move and didn't get laid, you're one of the 10.

72. During emergencies, women are likely to remain calmer than men. Though it should be noted that inventing minor crises on a weekly basis gives them more practice.

71. "Women grow hairs in a lot of the same places that men do lower abdomen, nipples we just get rid of them."

70. Unless they're lesbians, she won't approve of your hanging out with other girls. Even if they're ugly. And, really, even if they're lesbians.

69. If you have something to hide, she'll find it.

68. Eighty-five: The number of males per 100 females in Gary, Indiana, lowest male-to-female ratio of any city with a population of 100,000-plus. The highest male-to-female ratio is in Salinas, California: 114 males for every 100 females.

67. Kiss her before two dates have gone by or you'll be "friended."

66. They can't live without tension. Every once in a while she's gonna pick a fight with you for no reason. Accept this as a running, inevitable theme and your relationship will make a lot more sense.

65. The most painless way to end an argument: Let her win.

64. An online dating service's survey found that a woman's ideal man has brown hair and blue eyes.

63. In the U.S., 21 percent of women ages 18 to 59 hold out for their honeymoon.

62. A British study claims a woman's chances of getting married drop by 40 percent for every 16-point rise in her IQ. The same increase in IQ for a man boosted his chances of getting married by 35 percent.

61. When a woman tells you her problems, she does not want you to offer solutions.

60. Women often cite manhandling of breasts as the biggest foreplay faux pas.

59. "When I'm drunk, I can't come. Not even with a vibrator."

58. If they're going to do it, most wives cheat between the ages of 18 and 29.

57. Most women think they're better drivers than they are. Don't point this out while she's at the wheel or she'll freak and crash.

56. Women ingest about half the lipstick they apply, which means they eat approximately one to three sticks per year.

54. A woman might say she just wants sex, but sleep with her for a while and she'll change her tune. "I've known so many women who think they can pull this off, but they always develop feelings for the guy."

53. According to the American Association of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, Angelina Jolie's lips were the most requested celebrity feature among all female patients in 2004.

52. Despite always complimenting another woman's short haircut, she secretly celebrates having one less competitor, since men prefer long hair.

51. Don't call her "cute." In her mind it's the same as "not vomit-inducing." "Sexy," OK. "Hot," yes. "Fucking awesome," only if she's at least slightly buzzed.

50. Women often buy shoes a size or two small because they're in denial about the size of their feet which they can't stand.

49. They dream of one day peeing in a urinal.

48. Women know where they stand looks-wise but worry about being considered cool, about which they're unsure.

47. According to the U.S. Bureau of Statistics, 23 percent of 18- to 34-year-old women live with their parents, versus 31 percent of you losers.

46. Women want to talk dirty, but they're afraid you won't respect them in the morning. Reassure her that letting go in bed doesn't make her less classy and she'll probably go wild. Jagger helps.

45. Twenty-three percent of this MAXIM's readers are women.

44. A psycho jealous girl will do anything to keep her man including anal.

41. If she suddenly cuts her hair short, it might mean she no longer cares what you think of her. But that doesn't mean she doesn't care about someone else's opinion.

40. About half of all brides will lose a good friend over a ridiculous bridesmaid squabble.

39. It never hurts to say you're sorry, even if you don't mean it.

38. Let her beat you at something once in a while poker, chess, Ping-Pong and she'll be more likely to give you what you want, like some peace and quiet.

37. Women's public bathrooms are about three times more disgusting than men's.

36. "At one point or another, I've gone through your things looking for any evidence from past relationships. I'm talking photographs, postcards, mementos, address books, diaries. If you don't like it, get rid of this stuff before letting me in your apartment. It's not about trust; it's about curiosity, and it drives us crazy till it's been satiated."

35. Like you, girls hate nothing more than a clingy partner who needs them every eight seconds.

34. Chick rock strikes a deeply primal chord inside women while simultaneously revolting men. Just sit back and let her sing the Sarah McLachlan or Ani DiFranco song. It's only about four minutes long.

33. The average woman owns eight bras and wears each one five times before washing. Shasta!

32. Girls will not sit on any toilet outside their own home or a five-star hotel. Everywhere else they're hovering above the toilet in a squat.

31. Got a new girl coming over? Your (tidy) bathroom should include clean linen, a box of Puffs Plus, and several full rolls of TP.

30. "Don't caress our faces while we're kissing, unless you really, really, really like us."

29. On a first date, women never order what they really want to eat.

28. Breast augmentation surgery has grown by 257 percent since 1997. The most popular size? C-cup. As if you didn't know.

27. Gain her trust when you're out by calling her at 10 P.M. She'll go to bed content you're thinking of her, even if you're slurping Jell-O shots off some skank's cleavage.

26. Put down the Drakkar and grab a box of Good & Plenty. Women are turned on by the scent of black licorice.

25. At least one of her friends wants to sleep with you.

24. A good but flawed man is a fixer-upper gem, and women love nothing more than home improvements.

23. Every woman is self-conscious about her ass. Tell her you love her ass and you'll see it more often.

22. If you want more sex, tell your girl an attractive woman hit on you that day. Sixty percent of the time, it works every time.

21. More than half of surveyed females between 18 and 25 would prefer to be run over by a truck than be fat.

20. All women think they're smarter than their partners in some significant way.

19. The more piercings she has, the more places she'll let you put it.

18. Once in a while, let her pick the movie and don't complain about it.

17. Any good woman will tell ya, honesty is not always the best policy.

16. Chicks aren't afraid to get kinky; you just have to have the nerve to ask.

15. Girls don't want to date doormats. So make her proud and refuse to give up bowling night with the guys.

14. Don't take a woman to a concert you really want to see she'll just want to leave early.

13. "Women appreciate a big penis, but having one doesn't give you an excuse to suck at foreplay."

12. Studies show women are more attracted to "macho" guys near ovulation. The rest of the month, they're drawn to "good providers," otherwise known as chumps.

11. She likes one of your friends.

10. Ugly girls like to hang out with pretty girls because it makes them feel like they're more attractive. Pretty girls hang out with ugly girls for the same reason.

9. The minute she decides she's even mildly interested in you, she starts making mental pictures of what your kids would look like and imagining her first name with your last.

8. Sixty percent of women in the United States color their hair, according to L'Oral (who are obviously hoping they can peer-pressure the other 40 percent).

7. Dated a stripper? Keep your mouth shut, stupid.

6. Rub a sheet of medium-grade sandpaper across your face. That's your five o'clock shadow when you kiss her. Now rub that sandpaper on your inner thigh. (Mind you, we're not suggesting you shave.)

5. Female serial killers tend to use poison rather than guns or knives.

4. Foghat's "Slow Ride" is not about a trip in the car. Get the hint?

3. The one breakup line she'll never be able to argue you out of: "I'm sorry, but I no longer have feelings for you."

2. Buying a present for your girl? She'll hate it (and you) if she finds out you took along another woman to help pick it out.

1. You'll probably never know how many guys she's slept with. The standard lie is five. Which really means about 12.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 8 replies

What makes you intimidating to "boys?"

NanooNanoo — Tue, 26 Apr 2005 05:38:35 GMT

Oh...I believe you. I just want to know what it is that you think intimidates boys. It might be something entirely different you know. And another question...Is it more or less desirable for a man to remain intimidated by you? What happens if he breaks through and becomes fearless?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 44 replies

gender blogthings

arize — Thu, 13 Apr 2006 19:24:41 GMT

inspired by LB's post
(and my utter boredom at work today)
what gender is your brain? http://www.blogthings.com/genderbrainquiz/
how boyish or girlish are you? http://www.blogthings.com/howboyishorgirlishareyouquiz/

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 4 replies

Dating Questions Needed for Dating Column - Oral Sex/Lapdance Classes

Moxie — Wed, 12 Apr 2006 02:41:46 GMT

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posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

what intimidates you most...

999 — Fri, 10 Feb 2006 04:08:22 GMT

..about a girl?

for me, its not about "intimidation"...I get fucking nervous and tongue tied when ever I meet a pretty girl...

I get most nervous the first time I fool around with a chick. especially if I'm into her. and ALWAYS the first time we are about to have sex I feel like I'm about to pass out I get so worked up!!!

thats why I am so bad at one nighters...once I get to know someone and feel comfortable, I don't get "intimidated" anymore...

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

A is leaving Tribe tonight

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 20:15:49 GMT

TOU

Incredibly draconian and perhaps the most censurious of all the online communities'.

Flagging

My best friend posted pics of US soldiers who had died in Iraq, and maimed Iraq civilians. The former were flagged, and removed, no notice given or discussion offered. The horribly maimed Iraq citizens weren't deemed offensive, apparently. I wonder if the staffer who removed the pics looked at the pics to either side of the soldiers, or even read their own TOS?

New format

It sucks. It's just designed to net more views of different ads, not ease of use or fun. Nothing has been changed even though every comment I've read -- and there are a lot -- has been that the Tribe community hates it.

I had hung around hoping that something new would show up to take its place, but can't stand this anymore. Tribe is now administrered by uncaring, unresponsive, beaten-down, passive-aggressive staff and the self-righteous fanatics who have time to flag, flagrantly feeding their egos. There has been no improvement or even a slight halt to its downward slide. This is not something I want to contribute to anymore. My thanks to all the folks I used to talk with…and I hope ya'all will think on whether it's worth it to support Tribe as it is now.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

Polar Reactions

nahar — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 20:46:50 GMT

People either love me or hate me, there's really no gray area about how others feel about me. Especially men!

This post is a good example:
http://oklahoma.tribe.net/thread/d47ecf2d-e894-4e24-b2be-e27a416439a0?tribeid=6cd8c3a0-bcc7-4ff4-917a-5fef16eaedd3&r=10709

I am very nice, friendly, and accepting but I think I'm just a magnifier for people's insecurities.
I don't feel demanding for expecting other's to have a grip on their emotions. Most of the time people mistake my good natured joking for arrogance.

Sometimes I'm bewildered by people and at other times just plain amused.

How do others react to you?
Do you see a pattern between the genders?
How "bitchy" can you justify being?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 6 replies

tonight @ Club Good Hurt on Westside a Night to dance!!

kaycee — Tue, 17 Jan 2006 22:01:52 GMT

presented by the hot sexy adorable kozmik mammaz

da TueZday niGht prOjeCt
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hot nurses serving those beers
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be there

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posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

moments of weakness

Rebeca — Tue, 25 Oct 2005 16:41:13 GMT

ok girls, a moment of weakness...

So- as intelligent, powerful, atractive women, we have a lot of options, right? Men adore us and grovel before our feet. But which men is it that we adore? The select few who can give us a run for our money! A man who is intelligent, powerful, and attractive in his own right. Self assured, independent, and carismatic, right?

Ok. That said, why is it that (I am speaking only for myself here, but jump right in if you have some insight into this one!)
I meet such a man, and I instantly turn into an oozing pile of twitterpated jello? My flirtations turn to overkill, my sexy outfit is completely powerless (imagine batman's toolbelt fails him at a crucial moment, here), and my otherwise self assured intelligent conversation comes out of my mouth like a bad teletubbies re-run.

oh why, oh why, oh why?

Peace,
Rebeca

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 5 replies

stalking the unavailable, wtf?

kalisama — Sun, 06 Nov 2005 19:44:36 GMT

i've been noticing this pattern in myself and it ain't purty.

here's how it goes down....
i live in a really small rural area, not a ton of social life, the whole town has about 1000 people in it. meeting available single men who meet my very high standards is not easy in these parts. they're just not here.

so, what happens is i'll get involved in a "friends with benefits" deal, you know, the friend you've had for 5 or 10 years that you end up in bed with cuz you're both lonely but have no delusions of relationship potential with eachother.

and then, there's my latest escapade, a young man who was passing through town who was nearly 20 years my junior.... (fun, but c'mon, he's got a whole life of goddesses to explore yet.)

i'm seeing this pattern of seemingly the only men i can "get" are totally unavailable for relationship. i know this going in, and i still go in.

wtf? anyone else dealing with this?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 8 replies

moments of stregth

Rebeca — Sun, 06 Nov 2005 21:44:00 GMT

YEAH! I am so cool. I reclaim my power, because ...well... it's MINE, damn it! :)

I need never under estimate the power of taking my meds, a hot shower, and a good long nap :) A good night out with the girls never hurts, either!

I KNOW the answers to my "moments of weakness" already lay deep within myself. Channeling those answers up into my present moment is KEY, and when found ...feels SO good!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

sexual power struggle

rayann — Mon, 25 Apr 2005 02:26:39 GMT

i have noticed more than once that when i am intimate with a new person they often try to fight me for power.

i don't intend to dominate them, but i do insist on guiding the situation and do not like to feel a male-dominant vibe in bed, esp from people i don't know well yet.

i have experienced situations in which i am on top of a guy just making out, and they will try to switch positions in a somewhat aggressive manner. I will reverse back to how we were, and they will do it again getting more aggressive.

it may seem like a game to them, but it usually ends in me explaining that at this point i am in charge - take it or leave it.

it just really irritates me that when i express the degree of power that makes me feel comfortable by moving back on top they would try to reassert their dominance and win power by trying to switch positions again immediately.

does anyone else experience this?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 40 replies

calm and self-posessed

Rebeca — Sat, 05 Nov 2005 00:24:23 GMT

What makes you feel calm and self-posessed?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 2 replies

Soft Chubs

Thu, 18 Aug 2005 19:28:49 GMT

When the chips are down, men can't lie about whether they want to lie with us. Has anyone else found that a man's penis is a very accurate indicator of, not only his interest, but also his fear?

Whenever I was dating a guy who could only keep soft chubs -- and let me tell any guy reading that trying to get your wingwang back up by slapping it against anything, such as my cunt, while kneeling between my legs IS NOT SEXY -- I could reliably estimate the number of days it was until he started blaming me for being entirely too (enter manufactured problem here). *shrug* Anyway, it's NOT me, I dated lots of men who didn't have a problem, but dang if softchubs aren't really really accurate. Anyone else find the same thing?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 10 replies

How to approach and iNTIMIDATING gIRL

mojohifi — Tue, 07 Jun 2005 01:32:16 GMT

Some of you seem the type to be left alone at times, as a sign of strong individual personality.

Where and when do you prefer a man to start talking to you? And how?

(And how!)

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 32 replies

the other side

freshleef — Tue, 14 Jun 2005 05:27:30 GMT

I just split with the boyfriend, and something strange is occuring-- Im the calm one and hes the one acting out. That's a switch. I dont even want to cut his nards off, or do anything evil. I just want it to stop, and I'm being very aikido about it instead of getting my jollies antagonizing him (like with others in the past). ...It's sooooo peacefulll......That's gonna ruin my reputation! Perhaps I can intimidate by being complete with it all and not being a reactor...

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 11 replies

what does "trouble"mean?

jaclyn — Sun, 14 Aug 2005 22:34:35 GMT

i am dating a guy and he tells me that i am trouble. this may be a stupid question, but i can't figure this one out. HELP!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 6 replies

contraception tribe

rayann — Sat, 16 Jul 2005 16:39:01 GMT

there is a lot to talk about.

does birth control make you psycho?

where the hell is male contraception and why isn't it out yet?

what new methods are coming out and which ones are no longer available?

please share your wisdom girls

http://tribes.tribe.net/contraceptiontalk

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

Turned on RSS feed

kathryn — Tue, 05 Jul 2005 17:12:47 GMT

Hey there gang. I may be in absentia a lot, but I do check in occasionally. One of you requested the rss feed, and it is now accessible.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

do you forget?

arize — Mon, 13 Jun 2005 17:21:29 GMT

that you're intimidating
and maybe get into the middle of an argument or debate
only to realize later that everyone shut the fuck up
cause they just dont know what to say
cause you just intimidated the fuck out of em?
girls and boys alike

i just did this in an online forum where people i was calling friends did this barely passive pretty agressive back stab manuever and tried to pretend everything was all good.

of course i feel justified cause what they did was truely fucked up. and all i did was point it out very sucintcly, directly, unapologetically.

no one responded til the most macho dude finally said no one wants to take me on.

i wouldn't feel bad, but i feel a bit like i won cause my guns are bigger

and i forgot i had bigger guns
cause im only 5'2"
and they aren't heavy to me....

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 1 reply

when is it abuse?

arize — Sat, 28 May 2005 18:26:29 GMT

ever have a guy accuse you of being abusive
and while you want to check yourself to make sure
you actually believe that he's just saying that
as a way to avoid issues
and because his usual machismo just doesn't work?

one time a boyfirend got all in my face, in my house, because i busted him in a lie. he would not get out of my face. he was being threatening and just wrong.

i shoved him out of my immediate personal space
i used open palms on a part of his chest that i knew would not hurt him
if the wall had not been there behind him, he would have fallen on his ass. but i knew the wall would catch him and i knew he would not be physically hurt.
i knew the purpose of the shove was to draw clear and physical boundaries which he had already crossed.
he was surprised
he called me abusive
i think because he was scared and didn't like his inability to move my boundaries as he might have been used to with other women.

but the line gets fuzzy 'cause i actually could have kicked his ass in a fight and we both knew it. so in that case i have power over him and therefore the ability to intimidate and attempt to coerce him.

i don't think my boundary setting was wrong in the least.

but at what point does it cross the line into abuse?

i think its often hard for people who are not used to having power (women, people of color, any oppressed group) to reckon with what power they do have. when that's true its easier for those people to be wreckless with that power without realizing it, because they don't even know they have it.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 2 replies

ya know?

arize — Wed, 25 May 2005 07:07:19 GMT

side note:
this tribe is kinda big, sorta
and has a lot of boys in it
considering its nature
ever wonder about that??

ok.

so what IS the deal with the "hot" tough women these days. i mean ok, im kinda not so young anymore but back when i was little, and actually not even that long ago, it still wasn't so cool to be a tough chick. it wasn't sexy, it was grounds for hurling bigoted remarks about sexual orientation.

not that its all gone or anything, but now its like im "hot" to dudes BECAUSE my current icon is a side kick (never mind that im showing off my first pedicure). & you could probably come up with 500 other examples of this phenomena....

but in my experience this is only commercial deep. like watching tomb raider or kill bill got some dicks hard but seems to me like dudes don't actually want to take these women home. i mean they THINK they do but when they actually get you there they freak out in one way or another.

other similar experiences??

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 9 replies

for you girls

Tue, 24 May 2005 20:34:04 GMT

May 24, 2005 - 01:31 PM new
Pygmalion's "Prize"

"Now remember to keep perfectly still."
The only words spoken in three and a half hours
A small, dank room in a white moldy robe
Atleast the fruit is fresh...
Do I dare look down?
Why not?
I san see you staring intently with each stroke
How do I look to you?
Is your palette full of life?
Perhaps if you plucked me first you could have saved on rouge
But I am the Muse
And I should be grateful for life Eternal, right?
I get to be your blank screen
I get to see your projector eyes produce three dimensional lies
Are you enjoying the trip?
I, unfortunately already know the script
And my hair isn't that color
You would know that if you weren't so focused
On what I "should" be
So busy brushing, smearing, slapping those paints
(I should be so lucky)
But that's alright: you have your fun
Because when you're done
I'm going to devour that bowl of fruit
And have my way with your brushes
How do you like THEM apples?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

Hello from Humboldt newbie :)

Rebeca — Mon, 09 May 2005 22:58:20 GMT

Hello :) I just joined this tribe, so I thought I'd introduce myself :)
I have really enjoyed some of the very intelligent and thoughtful postings I have read on this tribe... "thank you"

Anyone else here in Humboldt County, CA?
Peace,
Rebeca

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 3 replies

I got it so bad.

rayann — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 23:52:44 GMT

I had a beautiful relationship with someone that turned into long distance when my studdies ended in mexico and i returned home. He came to canada 6 weeks later as we had planned but I could feel his fear from the time he got here.

while he was here he attacked me for:
1. being comfortable with my body - feeling secure about it and being comfortable with nudity
2. "knowing politics"
3. owning books about sex
4. using shamanic medicines to face my problems head on and explore my psyche

to me it looks like these are all signs of personal strength or power.

after he returned to mexico he brought up a decision that he had tried to make (about MY education) and I had told him that it should be a joint decision. His verdict on it is that by not blindly accepting his opinion on the situation and by trying to explain joint decision making i was "not respecting him"

has anyone else dealt with shit like this?

needless to say its over. the sad part is that he is totally oblivious to his sexism.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 15 replies

Honesty and Intimidation

katforan — Mon, 22 Nov 2004 02:27:37 GMT

So I came on here to post about one thing and I read through the last post which made me think about a few things- So to start:
Recently a guy I used to date was telling my current beau how lucky he was to have me- my bf replied- do you still want to date her (meaning me) and the response was- "No, She's too honest." which is flattering and also disturbing. I didn't realize honesty was truly the problem ever. I thought honesty was basically a good thing. BUt hey - we all make mistakes. I'll stick to honesty anyway though.
On to the second thing. The last post before this got a bit ugly. I admit I haven't been on here in a while- but it started out as fairly honest without being that negative. Though negativity happens get more than one person together in room and there will be at least two people who disagree. If they are of different sexes and minds its almost guaranteed.
But here's the thing- we don't always tell men exactly what we want because sometimes we're still figuring it out.
I know when I'm single I may be looking for several different things depending. Part of me will be looking for someone I was to have a relationship with- but in the meantime- if I am not meeting someone I want that from I'm also looking for someone I can have regular non committed sex from. Also they say men fall in love with their eyes, women with their ears. Which holds true with me. I usually know if I find someone interesting to spend more time with but I don't always know for a while if I am interested sexually or just as friends. It has happened in the past that I've known someone for a while and they are physically interested in me and I'm not but later I am- after that window has passed- it just takes a little longer- or sometimes I'm physically attracted but the more they speak the less I am. And sometimes I meet someone who is great for friendship and sex but not for a long term or committed relationship.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 20 replies

Hello

missem — Sun, 06 Mar 2005 06:43:04 GMT

just thought i'd day hi. i'm new-ish - just realized i didn't want to be too much of a lurker.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 7 replies

How about the boys in your life who weren't intimidated?

PaulaC — Mon, 25 Oct 2004 17:45:01 GMT

So we've had a lot of discussion on the guys we do intimidate and I was wondering about the guys that we do not intimidate. The guys who like us for who we are and are relaxed around us.

The guy who comes to my mind is my most recent ex. I guess I am pining in some small way, though I know it's over and am happy it's over. He was from Alberta, a backpacker, a physicist, a fellow ...eh...learnophile....I mean he loved to learn new things. He was mellow, quick to laugh, liked martial arts, and video games. What I loved about him is that he didn't expect me to be his negative space. I didn't have to fill his gaps. Rather, I was in to the same things, which is what is more often the case in a good friend.

He loved that I was a dedicated martial arts student and used to tease me saying that his Kung Fu would beat my aikido any day because he would never make the mistake of grabbing my wrist. Of course he was sorely mistaken. ; P He loved the fact that I could kick his ass in video games...okay he thought it was great for a while.

He didn't expect me to be the cook, the maid, and the voice of reason when it came to the flights of fantasy. Though I did do some of these things, he did as well and just as often as I.

Now I am surrounded by men who respect women, but do have a set of ideas of what women should be and it makes me miss Todd. He's doing his thing now and I'm doing mine, but I sure do miss being treated like an equal, embraced for who I am, and still seen as a very womanly woman.

How about you?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 24 replies

conundrum...need input!

cooldawn — Fri, 21 Jan 2005 06:08:22 GMT

mkay, so here's the deal...usually the thing about me that most intimidates guys is my big fat brain. I have this friend/ex-bf that is totally turned on by it, but at times has gotten his ego smushed because I don't need or want a knight in shining armour....I have proposed the idea of being friends who fool around, but he really wants an exclusive relationship.....opinions?!?!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 5 replies

BWIGWIB

PoolB — Sat, 04 Dec 2004 04:40:21 GMT

What about boys intimidates you?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 19 replies

cross-century communications

qatana — Mon, 06 Dec 2004 17:33:39 GMT

So last week at Dickens Fair I Met a Man.
I put the story up in my tribe but i think its pertinent to many of us here so if y'all dont mind hopping over to:

http://www.tribe.net/tribe/servlet/template/pub%2Ctribes%2CViewThread.vm?threadid=8ac04be0-cbba-4907-b723-3a88894cac72&_message_resource=info.post.created&tribeid=6effa888-cf9c-4d68-8b9a-1cb66e4cbc28

The whole story. with commentary from a married male friend.
Thanks for your input, if y'all got any!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 7 replies

a bit confused...

LovelyMzD — Wed, 01 Dec 2004 09:36:39 GMT

i just joined this tribe and i have read all the posts from like the last three weeks or so and i am wondering what exactly is going on here. Is this a tribe where strong women exchange experiences of what it is like being a strong, independent, and dead sexy...? Or is this a place where a bunch of macho chicks hang out and wait for spineless guys to lay at their feet or dicks with chips on their shoulders to come and provoke a fight? Um, intimidation is an emotional response....personally many men and women have told me they find me intimidating.....because i am charismatic and articulate, not because i yell, threaten or put anyone down. I have enjoyed the effect i can have, but in a nice way, not in a big bully way....whats the deal?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 5 replies

People Who Respect Other People

kathryn — Wed, 24 Nov 2004 14:55:01 GMT

Dear GWIB members,

I apologize for not being around as often recently. Real life has taken a bit out of me and refuses to give it back.

As I have stated before, antagonistic, offensive or insulting behavior will result in removal from the tribe. And I stand by that rule. The tribe is two people shorter this morning.

I started GWIB for a reason. To promote growth, learning and understanding for everyone involved. Not to create a forum for gender bashing or justification of sexist or mysognist attitudes (and that's directed as much at the women as it is the men).

One of the most disappointing facts here is that members who have posted some phenomenal pieces are gone now because they were offended and tired of the infighting. Many have opined that the tribe has gotten too large to function as well as it did in the beginning. I'm not sure about that, but I do know that the overall quality of discussions has degraded from where it was before.

I'd like to see a return of the community we once created in this tribe. I would like to see this tribe promote communication, understanding and empathy. I would like to see that spread out beyond our computer screens and into our daily lives. I wish safety, happiness and health to all of you.

Kathryn

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 10 replies

New here

Tue, 30 Nov 2004 21:33:15 GMT

Hi all!

Im new here. Im a 27 year old male form Sydney Australlia. If you want check out my site http://www.robertdavies.net got a bunch of pics on there. my messenger details also. Hope to make some cool friends!!!

Rob

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

Ouch, I get it now!!

DeniseDenise — Mon, 22 Nov 2004 21:25:45 GMT

So, without going into too much detail I think I am going to have to leave this tribe. I just had a revelation about why I intimidate boys and I am doing some deep soul conditioning to reverse the problem. In other wrds. I'm gonna stop intimidating them.

Usually, they are so attracted by my open nature that they are drawn right into my life, want to date, etc... Then, once they are mesmorized by how available and open I am, I turn around and expect that they become as open as I am. In fact, I get pissed and feel rejected when they dont.

Not only have I been expecting too much of the men in my life (i realize now how it must feel on his end, manipulated, pressured, overwhelmed), but I'm also putting myself in a way too vulnerable situation.

This scenario has backfired on me my whole life but I am just able to see it now. I either scare them away or they are still calling me asking me to marry them. Its all too quick.

Any suggestions on how to make a speedy recovery??

Thanks,
Your soon to be ex-member.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 19 replies

Is it intimidation or self deffense ?

decadent1 — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 23:47:43 GMT

US Boys do not know how to handle drama. I do not. When I see a girl who is Looking London talking Tokyo .. I RUN.
As in she is being dishonest to her self and to you.
"OH NO I AM NOT LOOKING FOR ANY THING SERIOUS, BUT IT WOULD BR NICE TO FIND SOMETHING SERIOUS, BUT NON COMMITAL, BUT ID ONT LIEK SLEEPING WOTH PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT COMMITED< BUT NO ONE IS GOING TO GET MINE FOR FREE, BUT I WANT SOMETHING CASUAL, BUT I JUST GOT OUT OF A RLEATIOSHIP SO I AM NOT LOOKING FOR SERIOUS, I WANT A REBOUND< BUT REBOUNDS CAN TURN INTO SERIOUS"
ALL THAT SCREAMS DRAMA. Their is noting wrong in stating what you want and standing behind it. Don't tell the guy what you think he wants to hear. Say what you mean, save us the drama. We are not stupid, we just play stupid , we fuck and then we run:)

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 39 replies

Irritating vs. Intimidating

heatheroni — Mon, 25 Oct 2004 20:41:59 GMT

Here's an interesting subject that I thought deserved a thread of its own.

As I'm certain I've mentioned before, ages and ages ago, it seems, I've often considered whether people have found me irritating or intimidating. Ultimately, I believe it's a mix of both, varrying by the situation and the person.

Likewise, there are men and women in this tribe who I find terribly intimidating (yes, even through a computer monitor), and others who I consider irritating. Fortunately, most poeple fall somewhere safely in the middle.

What about everyone else? Do you think that maybe poeple find you more irritaing or intimidating? Or have you ever thought about it? And would you tell someone you find irritating that you are intimidated by them simply to save their feelings? Vice versa?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 25 replies

No no no.. I mean

Cocobean — Thu, 28 Oct 2004 21:13:49 GMT

What would Freud say to the Guys that are intimidated by the Broads?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 21 replies

What would Freud say about

Cocobean — Tue, 26 Oct 2004 21:12:29 GMT

all of this

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 11 replies

Are we really THAT intimidating?

alih — Sun, 24 Oct 2004 22:31:37 GMT

Just a-wonderin'

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 77 replies

Anger

heatheroni — Tue, 24 Aug 2004 17:08:07 GMT

I just read an article:

www.cnn.com/2004/TECH/sc...e/08/24/science.aggression.final.reut/index.html

Which is really not of much significance to this post, except that it got me thinking about male/female anger dynamics.

I am an angry person. I don't know why. Possibly my upbringing, possibly some genetic pre-disposition, possibly just my nature. Who knows. The point is that I get angry in what many would consider considered a typically male fashion. I lose my temper quickly. I slam doors, raise my voice, throw things, and occasionally become physically violent. I'm not proud of this behavior, but that's just how I react. I'm certain that this has contributed to my own intimidating nature.

I'm curious how many other GWIB's have anger issues and how do those issues relate to your particular intimidation issues?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 74 replies

Women over 30

AnathemaD — Sun, 17 Oct 2004 19:41:50 GMT

This was posted on the "Hot chicks who dig smart guys" tribe thought it belonged over here as well. Apparently it's one of those bits of Internet folklore that's been attributed to various folks, including Andy Rooney, who turns out has quoted it but did not originate it. Was originally women over 40, but one of us hot intimidating chicks nearing 40 and feeling it appropos lowered the age. Says something about our society, eh? Anyway, enjoy!

*********************************************************

As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting. A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants, and from whom. Few women past the
age of 30 give a damn what you might think about her or what she's doing. Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated. A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over 30 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her. Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 30. They always know. A woman over 30 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 30 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one! You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 30 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 30+, there is a paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?". Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 34 replies

girls who intimidate bosses

lobocita — Thu, 07 Oct 2004 03:17:06 GMT

has this happened to you? felt like your boss was a bit intimidated by you?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 16 replies

"He takes good care of me"

abbyutiful — Fri, 08 Oct 2004 23:19:28 GMT

The other day, I was describing the man in my life, and I said, "He takes good care of me," but don't tell anyone in Girls Who Intimidate Boys I said that. Then I thought, "Well, now I'll HAVE to post it," and so here I am... posting it.

I think the trick about feeling taken care of for me is that I want the kind of support and caretaking I need, not the kind that makes the other person feel like they are fulfilling some role. Like if a guy bought me diamonds and a luxury vacation, I'd think he didn't know me at all. If a guy did my dishes or let me put a Biore on his nose for fun or made me a peanut butter and banana sandwich, I'd be much more impressed! The ways in which I want to be taken care of are very specific. I'm good at saying what they are. I feel taken care of when someone is a good listener and responds to my actual needs instead of what he THINKS I need.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 19 replies

Nosy

sarasada1 — Wed, 06 Oct 2004 23:05:54 GMT

How many of us intimidating girls have our own personal man to intimidate every day? I was just asking bec, my bf and I are having a break, and i'm wondering just how hard it is for us to "hook it up" you know if we are just doomed to be single forever or if some of us have the pleasure of being loved for being loud and intimidating. Or if it's too personal-forget it. Dont' answer and i'll go on wondering.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 47 replies

girls who intimidate girls

monkeyshines — Mon, 27 Sep 2004 20:59:55 GMT

Do you, as a loud 'n proud woman, ever feel like you intimidate less vocal women?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 24 replies

Why do you need a man?

abbyutiful — Thu, 30 Sep 2004 12:04:47 GMT

My friend's boyfriend broke up with her last weekend. She talked about how she doesn't need a man for a lot of the reasons men want to be needed. She can pick out a restaurant, she can support herself financially. She can lift things that are heavy. She doesn't need many things explained to her. She's a strong, opinionated, competent woman like many of us here. This got me thinking,

What things DO you need from a man, and what things do you NOT need from a man? It can be emotional stuff, or just really everyday stuff. And it can be stuff you just NEED someone in your life to be able to help you with, even if it doesn't necessarily have to be your man!

I need a man for love and support. I need someone who can help me to structure myself when I get all ADD-overwhelmed. I need a man (or at least someone) to help me when I buy computer hardware. I know software, not hardware. I need a man if I'm doing construction stuff that requires heighth. I need a man to do the dishes, to do laundry. Dishes make me cranky. Laundy... I never remember to change it over.

I don't need a man to pick out a restaurant, manage my finances, explain complicated things to me, tell me what my opinions are, keep me from getting wet in a storm, assemble furniture (although help is nice. I just know how to do this myself.), pay for everything (I'm broke now, but I won't always be), protect me from the world...

And there are lots of things where I see it as a splitsies situation. If I'm doing projects around the house, I'd love help, but I'm still competent. The boy in my life right now respects my computer acumen, but has more than me, so he's often really helpful in that arena, and I'm happy to let him be.

On another note, I adore cooking. I actually like to cook, so I don't feel resentful when I cook a lot more than he does. I'm most grateful when he cooks on a weekday after I've had a long day. When there's more time, I like to cook. But I love him to hang around and keep me company and act as my sous chef. That's really handy!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 47 replies

Sexualy confident

michele — Fri, 01 Oct 2004 14:17:51 GMT

I am an EXTREMLY sexualy confident woman who knows what she likes and knows what she wants. Lets just say I've been around the block a few times. Recently, I find myself intimidating guys because of this fact. Anyone else out there run into this problem?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 25 replies

deleted

qatana — Fri, 08 Oct 2004 04:45:43 GMT

I just deleted the thread i started when i got to thinking about how and why people have negative reactions to how we approach them.
I realised that the person i was talking about could read this at any time, and i didn't think it fair to her to see herself discussed publicly.
After all, the Last time i started a thread about a specific person it was the final straw in ending a fragile new friendship.
If the person has already read it, i apologise for sharing a subject that clearly causes you pain. i hope that pain is eased for you.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

Gift Idea

abbyutiful — Sun, 03 Oct 2004 01:13:23 GMT

For the GWIB who has everything... http://www.plumparty.com/partysupplies/15835.html

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 21 replies

Hi Ladies!!!

Tue, 05 Oct 2004 21:27:13 GMT

I am new to this tribe, just saying hello for now.

:)

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 3 replies

Stood up again!

sugarbunni — Tue, 28 Sep 2004 02:07:05 GMT

Yes, again. I must not be too freakin' intimidating according to my recent dating trend. Is there something about me that subconsiously tells people my time is not valuable? Or, maybe there's an invisible vibe I give off that gives the impression that I like sitting in coffee shops waiting for imaginary dates? Maybe I have a "let's make pretend plans" aura around me? Or maybe, just maybe, some people are big fucking flakes.

Poo.

Don't mind me, I'm pissy.

But, geez, if I can hobble out to a coffee date with a broken leg....

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 9 replies

so what about you intimidates men?

monkeyshines — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 21:18:09 GMT

as for me, i think it's a combination of having vocal opinions, a very loud and distinctive laugh, and um, strong libido. I could be wrong though.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 46 replies

Boys in need of waxing

circleA — Wed, 01 Sep 2004 07:26:29 GMT

Man, PDX men seem to be white and hairy. I just want to let it be know that a back waxing is not Metrosexual, it is necessary. I don't consider myself shallow, but come on, the days of the Viking are OVER!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 43 replies

GWIBM

sugarbunni — Thu, 09 Sep 2004 21:34:37 GMT

Yes, that's right, Girls Who Intimidate Burning Men.

I know very well that some of my fellow GWIBs in here were out there. So, what were your experiences in that environment?

My personal experience was that I still managed to intimidate boys. I frightened fellows in frocks and spooked swingers with style. Interestingly enough, even the most hardcore men on the playa (yes, the DPW) cannot hang with this bodacious bunni. If a girl can't get her freak on in freak central what hope is there? Heh!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 23 replies

intimidating, bitchy or both?

monkeyshines — Thu, 09 Sep 2004 22:59:38 GMT

so I just had an opportunity to intimidate my landlord with my forceful manner. we have a huge ant problem in our apartment, and he told my housemate he actually had to see the ants coming out of the wall before he would do anything about it. Well, the ants happen to come out at night and crawl all over us while we try to sleep. I called him up & told him so, and mentioned the bathtub drain that he hasn't fixed for a year, and asked if we'd need to call a plumber. I felt forceful, but who knows if he'll actually do anything about it. And now I feel kinda guilty because I was bitchy.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 6 replies

Attraction

trinsic — Thu, 02 Sep 2004 10:15:21 GMT

When I was a kid I was usually found playing hop scotch with the girls, I think guys my age thought I was weird, but I have this fascination with perspectives other than my own. So I would infiltrate a group of girls and try to get there opinion on things. At first I thought the girls would be annoyed at a single boy introducing himself as Trinsic and then barraging them with questions, but when I started asking questions that most boys never asked them I started to become something of a prodigy to them.
I would ask them why they liked certain things, for instance when I was 15 my friend’s sister had a picture of David Bowie on here wall and I wondered if other girls had the same fascination for rock stars that are so much older than them. So I would ask groups of girls this, the responses I would get were fascinating. In that most of them felt a certain connection with him. When I compare this to what guys thought of rock stars it was totally different. Guys tended to lean towards outward appearance, attitude, cloths, ect as opposed to inward things that girls were interested in.

It was then that I discovered that I wanted to better understand men/women dynamics.

So anyway that’s one of my topics of interest these days. One of the things I am studying is male/female attraction, and how they differ from the two. And also gender roles in the modern age.

For me I have this attraction to strong women who are very quick witted. I find it extremely seductive when a woman can see that I am teasing her about something, or playing with her and she is able to come back with an equally quick response, and then turn it around on me.

So what is it that attracts you most to a strong man/women in regards to their conversation skills?

Or do some stronger women prefer men that are more passive?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 12 replies

Fantasizing

trinsic — Sat, 04 Sep 2004 08:58:41 GMT

This may be a little off topic and a touchy subject, but I have always been curious if it might be bad for a encounter physcologically to have sexual fantasies before meeting someone in person that you are attracted to?

Like if you have had 4play over the phone then decided to meet in person could that hinder building a friendship/or a romantic relationship somehow?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 10 replies

Yet another new creature

Sat, 04 Sep 2004 01:42:47 GMT

Hello all,

I saw this Tribe listed in a friend's friend's Tribe listing (honestly!), and it instantly caught my eye.

I am a boy who's not intimidated by any girl. In fact, the types of girls I feel most comfy around or attracted to seem to be those that intimidate most boys. The stronger/nuttier/wittier/bolder/rougher/more creative/etc., the better, in my opinion.

a few weird/fun statistical thingies/coincidences:

- about 95% of the girls I find interesting or attracted to are gay.
- about 95% of the girls who are attracted to me are bisexual.
- an abmormally large proportion (in comparison with the average population) of the girls I know are either unable to conceive or cannot conceive without causing grave danger to themselves or their fetuses (feti?), either because of past/present medical conditons or injuries, or because of genetic peculiarities.
- an abmornally large proportion (in comparison with the average population) of girls who i've dated were involved with football or wrestling in school (usually facts I earned well after meeting them)

something tells me that the Fates are having fun with my life...

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

Hi, I'm new!

teresanamita — Mon, 23 Aug 2004 16:34:43 GMT

It's so great I found this tribe, as this has been a problem for me for a while now. I think I'm a fun, honest, kind, goofy,pretty, gutsy woman, yet I can't get a man to want to date me or care about me as anything other than a sex object or a buddy. Its not like I NEED it at this point in my life, but still...

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 19 replies

what is chemistry?

pyrokitten — Thu, 05 Aug 2004 20:29:57 GMT

kathryn's comment intrigued me:
"I've always loved the line from the song One Night In Bangkok: "I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine." To me, that's all about what makes chemistry. Thoughts, ideas, intellect. And I get to know how a guy's brain works through conversation, not how fast it takes for him to make a pass."

for me, chemistry is super important, as i'm sure it is for most (if not all) people. but it's obvious that people define it differently, so i'm curious about how you all see it.

while the intellectual component is a big part of attraction for me (okay, a huge part, i'm rarely attracted to guys who aren't smart), chemistry is far more than that. i've come to the conclusion that chemistry really *is* chemistry, as in pheremones, scent, etc. something impalpable that really gets your motor running. for all the attractors on my list from the other thread, if there's no chemistry, then there's no romantic relationship. i had a crush on an amazing guy once who was everything i wanted - smart, adventurous, playful, handsome, sweet, AND later he was in love with me. at times since then i've kicked myself for letting him get away, but i just didn't feel the same about him, no chemistry (or not enough anyway).

chemistry is that indefinable something that you can't quite put your finger on, but it makes your heart race, makes you think about the other person all the time, makes you tingle when you think about him. and all the lists in the world don't mean a thing if it's not there. it's based on the traits in the list to some extent, but there's something more to it for sure.

i find that as i've gotten older and more experienced, i have a better idea of what i want, and the qualities and traits are matching up with chemistry. it's good because i don't get so passionate about/wrapped up in boys who aren't trustworthy. but still, in some ways it's still a mystery to me, and that's a good thing...

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 20 replies

Opposing View points

trinsic — Fri, 20 Aug 2004 22:39:02 GMT

Has anyone ever felt isolated for having courage to express a difference of opinion to a group of people that you know will dislike you based on your views that run contrary to their own?
But because you are more committed to being honest about your views, you do it anyway knowing full well its going to jeopardize your friendship with someone or a group of people, even a career?

Has anyone experienced this and if so how did you handle it?

Hopefully this is not going to come off a sounding like I am trolling. I figured since this is a tribe of people that intimidate others; it must partially be related to being very opinionated.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 17 replies

Compassion is Key

kathryn — Thu, 19 Aug 2004 18:52:20 GMT

It is my intention and desire that we all have the opportunity to learn and grow here. That means running across opinions that are foreign and possibly offensive to us. But I think it's important that we not forget to act with class and compassion, even when that is the case.

If someone challenges your way of thinking, please consider it a chance to reevaluate your ideals and see if they need updating. Nobody's wrong. Everybody is in a state of evolution and growth (even the stagnant ones, at least in my opinion).

Debate and challenges are instrumental in all of us learning more about ourselves and each other. I highly encourage disagreeing with each other about your life views, as long as that's communicated with respect and maturity.

I would prefer not to lose any more members of this tribe because they feel harassed, put upon, ganged up on or insulted. Every contributor's input in this tribe is priceless to me. Thanks for coming here and sharing your ideas.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 28 replies

New here

Sat, 21 Aug 2004 03:46:02 GMT

Hi, Just joined the tribe. I'm not sure what all has been going on. There seem to be a *lot* of posts back and forth, etc. Figured I'd just start out by starting a new topic.

My question is about the issue of "intimidating guys" in particular. For the women - do you find that this is an issue only when dealing with men in the areas of romantic relationships/dating? Or do you find that you intimidate people in general - platonic male friends, other women, coworkers etc.

Basically, is there something specific about relating to men as romantic partners that leads to the impression that we are "intimidating" them.

Thanks in advance for your comments!

Anita

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 0 replies

SugarBunni Kicks Ass

heatheroni — Thu, 19 Aug 2004 22:15:35 GMT

That all.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 11 replies

definition of troll

qatana — Fri, 20 Aug 2004 23:35:16 GMT

I just googled for this, its the first one that came up:

Often suffering from a mutant strain of compulsive posting disorder, a troll's basic mission in life is to mischievously manufacture inflammatory opinions in an attempt to stir up disharmony and discord.

The most common breed of troll seeks attention by enthusiastically posting up a stream of off-topic drivel or by being clumsily provocative (like posting up, "PCs ROOL!" on an Apple Mac discussion board.)

Ignore them. The worst thing you can do is to try and engage them in rational debate as this only encourages them to hang around.

And once they find themselves the centre of attention, they inevitably become more and more 'controversial' before building up to a crescendo of abuse, followed by a theatrical flounce.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 8 replies

Recent Conversation

misscheeky — Fri, 20 Aug 2004 19:46:16 GMT

Recently someone told me that one of the things like like most about me is that I am so honest and open with who I am and that I don't try to hide or alter myself to suit someone else's needs. They also commented that it makes them wish they could be more like that and not be deceitful or manipulative, but that they find it difficult.

I replied, "Well, I don't know how to be any other way". I was then told that in particular is what they find most amazing - not that I am honest and open, but that it is effortless.

This seems to be a theme lately and I don't get it. Why do people find it so hard to just be who they are? Why do they have to hide themselves or decieve or manipulate? I just can't wrap my head around it and it is driving me crazy.

And it is also driving me crazy that for some reason my ability to do that is off-putting or intimidating or shocking.

Sorry I know I have mentioned this before, but I had to vent because this is like the thrid time I've heard this in two months and I am frustrated.

And while they might not be overtly doing so, I fee a little pressure from these people to be more like them. But in doing that I am less of me. Ugh!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 7 replies

I Love You, I Can't Touch You Anymore

kathryn — Fri, 20 Aug 2004 17:15:20 GMT

I'm borrowing the title from a Magnetic Fields song, but the tone's moderately serious.

I was thinking about a past relationship this morning and wondering if the reason I don't hear from him anymore is that I remind him that he failed. The first time he hurt my feelings, he looked maudlin and said he couldn't stand to see pain in my eyes and know that he'd caused it. And then he said I didn't look at him the same way anymore, that he missed the adoration in my eyes. I didn't realize I was looking or acting any different. I mean hell, pain is part of a relationship. I know that. And I'm not necessarily afraid of it. It doesn't make me want to cut my losses immediately.

I've been told I have an incredibly expressive face. It's kinda like a cartoon, or a short movie, where you can see all of these different emotions play across it. I sometimes say I don't wear my heart on my sleeve, I wear it on my face. And I worry that sometimes, others interpret what's going on inside my head & heart just by watching that happen.

My question is this, and it's more directed towards the guys, but as always, any opinions are welcome...

Hypothetical scenario: You fucked up. You know you did, she knows you did, everyone knows you did. And that girl that used to look at you like you're Valentino is now wary and guarded when you're face to face. Does that affect your own self image? Does it affect your feelings toward her, or the relationship?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 16 replies

Too much too soon?

sugarbunni — Tue, 10 Aug 2004 00:53:46 GMT

I recently went on a first date that seemed really great, but I haven't heard back from the guy. We seemed very compatible, but I'm thinking maybe I was a bit too open and upfront because things were so comfortable. Any other GWIBs out there ever question whether their outgoing, intimidating personalities should start off a bit more edited when meeting a new person? I know I should have no regrets, but I can't help wondering if I shouldn't have been more conservative with the personal info I shared. I have this tendancy to be a bit of an open book when I meet someone I like. Maybe mystery is more appealing at first. And, fyi, I didn't have sex with him so that can't be the obvious reason for not hearing from him! Ha! Seriously tho, that would at least make more sense, (kind of!)

I suppose much of these thoughts I'm having are just my little pity party for feeling rejected or something. I don't reasonably believe that I could ever attepmt to edit myself if I found myself in a similar situation. I'm probably miffed, too, because I thought this guy was the type that I wouldn't need to edit myself with. Ah, well... more fish... yada, yada!

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 82 replies

Sigh

trinsic — Thu, 19 Aug 2004 21:37:56 GMT

Look Id like to set the record straight here because I really feel like some of you dislike me based on some of my views, which I believe are perfectly valid, and if you did some on research on the subjects I am talking about you would find that there is some truth to it. Maybe they way of which I am saying this is putting you off, get over it, that’s they way I am, im not here to sugar coat a topic.

I started some topics in a controversial way and it probably putt a lot of people off. It was designed to get people into an interesting discussion. I mostly I’m ok with it. But now people are using it as away to identify everything I am saying as being possibly suspect.

There are no negative or positive ways of looking at things, things are as they are. Only when we take an idea and change into something does it become something more than it really is, in our minds.

We re-present everything we take in from the outside world, and then we make a judgment call if it is positive or negative, based on our past experiences.
We also have a collective conscience of past experiences that humanity knows is right and wrong, most of us base our morals off of those experiences.

For instance I have my own set of beliefs of right and wrong, but I also subscribe to some absolutes that most of humanity believes in, like it being wrong to murder some one.

I really like allot of comments I have heard regarding the interesting stuff, but it makes me sad that some of you have completely shrugged me off as someone not worth getting to know better. It's a mistake on your part to subscribe to that ideal, I have a lot to say and at lot to learn. My methods of communication maybe be a little outrageous, but so what? Also lighten up a bit, don’t take everything I am saying as an absolute..

I wonder if some of you guys have a real problem with people who have new ideas that run contrary to you own, and stay close minded because of it.

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 27 replies

Ohh yea and one more thing

trinsic — Wed, 18 Aug 2004 23:26:06 GMT

Going back to the gender specific topic since you girls are so bent on see the sexes as equals, why do most women not have the guts to come up to a guy and say somthing outrageous and funny like "Umm when are you going to get up the courage and talk to me?!?"

Or maybe you guys can come up with a better approach for a women.
Mostley I see ME having to do all the leg work and the women just gets to sit there and let it all happen.. Ok so im sterotyping again, sue me ;) But maybe some of you are differnt. In general women like to be treated equal, but when it comes down to it most of them cant cut it being open like that. it probabley has something to do with how the women is going to be precived by her friends right? See men dont have that same problem. They get props when the go after a girl aggressively.. err, wait I guess this could happen for guys too accept we wouldnt be percived as sluts like some women strerotype other women right ?
I have to tell you, its dam sexy to see a women come at me like that..

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 45 replies

something that intimdates ME...

Wed, 18 Aug 2004 12:05:54 GMT

Hi all, just joined up & wanted to offer greetings and get your collective take on something.

12 years after getting my bachelors, I have enrolled back in school. Not sure if at this point I'm getting another degree or just adding skills. And I'm a little freaked...how has university culture changed since I've been there? I know I will probably not be the only "nontraditional" student, but I don't wanna feel like a total fish out of water. Is there still a group of cool, privileged kids that I'm gonna have to act all disdainful of while secretly yearning for their approval? Does sleeping with the instructors still get you better grades? Is it still possible to not attend a single class & yet pass it? Am I just gonna be too tired to do this?

Gotta be a lot of adult students out there, what are your experiences?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 6 replies

Carebears, who loves them more men or women?

trinsic — Wed, 18 Aug 2004 07:25:21 GMT

Personally I love my Carebear more than you, and I can prove it! I have a carebear that is 10 feet tall and I take him where ever I go. Somtimes I cant fit through doors and stuff, but I get a laugh when I hug my carebear! I usually give him a great big hug in the park and push him on the swing set what kinds of things do you do with your carebear?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 16 replies

Clueless on Signals, I think?

trinsic — Wed, 18 Aug 2004 17:05:14 GMT

Last night I met this girl that works behind the drink counter at borders and I notice that she changes her appearance quite often when I see her. hairstyle, cloths, color styles, shoes, makeup/sparkles, you name it. I find that I appreciate her attention to detail and variety.

So anyway I let her know that every time I see her she looks completely different and that it surprises me. She asked if it was in a good or a bad way, and I said I like it. So we banter back and forth a bit, she messes up my chi tea order and I tease her about it, she laughs and acts surprised that I am giving her shit, but is still talking to me. So I tell her I have to go and study as I leave and she says, "Ok, im going to be around" or something close to that effect. It seemed kind of strange for her to tell me she is going to be around..

Am I the only guy who is clueless when reading signals, I sure feel like it sometimes :)

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 19 replies

Greetings.

trinsic — Tue, 17 Aug 2004 06:18:31 GMT

I never know if I need to introduce myself to a tribe, usually Ill just comment on something and someone will find what I’m saying interesting and come talk to me, but in this case I have this strangest feeling I’m in a lions den of dominate women who attack first and ask questions later.

That being the case I figured I would create a little misdirection by asking a question first. :)

I got into an argument with a friend the other day about the secret question that men have been wondering since the beginning of time, who lie's more men or women?

See I think most women believe that men lie more than women do. But the only reason that we have had a bad rap about this is that we get caught more often then women. Tell me girls, when have you ever not being able to catch a man in the act of lying when you asked him what he was doing out all night?

And for us men, when a women lies we believe it. The next day we will be hanging out with our friends and one of them will ask us "So what did she say about where she was the other night?" and the guy will be like "Ohh she was at a hotel with a girl friend because she didn’t want to drive home, that’s all". Maybe the friends will have doubts but the guy will believe because she didn’t give him any reason not to. :)

So who lies more, men or women? And why do you think it’s easier for women to lie more than men?

You wouldn’t want to attack little'o'me now would you?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 41 replies

Imposing Labels - the burden

Simone — Fri, 06 Aug 2004 14:20:38 GMT

Quite often, I have people - friends, strangers, acquaintances, etc. say of their own volition (and in my mind, without provocation), that I am strong. Over and over people tell me that I am powerful, strong, brilliant....and I must say that at times I grow sick of it. There is this expectation that I am then compelled to live up to....and its a weird feeling - I know that I am strong and all those other good things...but I always sometimes can be weak and silly and selfish...all of the things that make up a person...yet with the label of strong, I don't feel like I can let myself show people my weaknesses...and it very hard to lean on anyone...even when I am weary. Do such labels create a false expectation both on the part of the labeller and the labelee....does anyone else get tired of being "strong" all the time?

posted in gIRLS who iNTIMIDATE bOYS - 8 replies

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Sigh

Ohh yea and one more thing

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Carebears, who loves them more men or women?

Clueless on Signals, I think?

Greetings.

Imposing Labels - the burden

Stood up again!